


Tequila Surprise

by IceAngelDarkMoon



Category: The Losers (2010), The Losers (Comic), The Losers - All Media Types
Genre: First Kiss, Getting Together, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-22
Updated: 2014-04-22
Packaged: 2018-01-20 09:56:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1506257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IceAngelDarkMoon/pseuds/IceAngelDarkMoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Losers are out at a bar drinking, however they forget to pay attention to Jensen after his margarita arrives without salt. As usual he gets a bit creative.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tequila Surprise

The waitress carefully set down the tequila bottle and shot glasses on the battered tabletop. Then she walked back to the bar quickly, shouting “un momento” over her shoulder before Jensen could even open his mouth to ask his question. He tried not to pout as Clay started to pour the tequila into the glasses for himself, Aisha, Pooch, and Cougar.

“Did you know it is a common misconception that all tequila comes with a worm in the bottle?” Jensen started to ramble, trying to distract himself from his missing drink. “But actually only one type does and it’s more of a gimmick than anything.” Jensen took a moment to breathe, but Pooch used that moment to interrupt him.

“Dude, Jensen, don’t ruin this for me man.” Pooch ran a tired hand over his face, starting from his bald scalp pulling it down past his chin. “The Pooch does not want to hear about bugs and food at the same time!” Pooch quickly downed his shot and put the glass back on the table.

“So then you don’t want me to tell you about the most common violations of food sanitation codes? Not that this place has likely ever passed an inspection. In fact, my guess is that the food inspectors are too scared to step foot in here.”

Before Jensen could continue his tirade on the likely bugs crawling around behind the counter, the waitress returned and handed Jensen his drink. She was already leaving for another table when Jensen realized there had been a mistake.

“Miss, this isn’t right, where’s the salt?” He held the strawberry margarita at distance from his body while he squinted at the salt-less rim in confusion.

“No mistake, no tenemos sal.” ( _We don’t have salt_ ). Again the waitress left before Jensen could say anything else.

“Buck up kid; think of it as training wheels to drinking tequila like an adult.” Clay patted his shoulder good naturedly, but Jensen only rolled his eyes.

“Really, what sort of man drinks a pink fruity thing at a dive bar anyway?” Aisha asked one eyebrow raised in challenge. As Jensen met her eyes she smirked and slammed back her shot of tequila, and then held out her shot glass to Clay for a refill.

Jensen just stuck out his tongue at her and contemplated his glass again. He was quiet while Clay and Cougar finished their shots, and Aisha took a second. His silence should have alerted the others that Jensen was plotting something. Especially when he took furtive glances around the table before looking at Cougar with a contemplative look. Just as Pooch was telling the table about Jolene’s plans for a barbeque when the Losers next visited her, Jensen interrupted.

“Cougs, you don’t use any aftershave or special skin care, do you?” Cougar raised a single eyebrow at the hacker. He took in the way Jensen was idly playing with the condensation on his margarita glass. It was clear that Jensen was doing some internal calculations, but the sniper had no idea what exactly Jensen was trying to figure out. But he trusted Jensen enough to know that he wouldn’t be in any physical danger by answering the strange question.

“No. Tienen un olor.” ( _They have a scent_ ) Cougar replied when he realized the eyebrow was not enough to deter Jensen. Jensen, for his part, just nodded like that was exactly what he was expecting and didn’t say anything else on the subject. Instead he was again looking at his salt-less margarita and swirling the contents. The rest of the table watched him for another moment before Pooch picked back up the thread of conversation before Jensen’s strange question. Pooch was just talking about possibly getting a sprinkler for the kids to play in when Jensen made his move.

Sometimes it was easy to forget that Jensen was a trained killer, the same as the rest of them. And that he was one of the better ones at close combat. But Cougar was reminded roughly, as out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jensen spring into motion. Before Cougar could even turn he felt Jensen lightly grab his chin and halting the turning of his head towards Jensen. The next moment something warm and wet swiped from his jaw line to his eye. And just as fast as the tongue attack to his face had happened, it was over. Jensen was back in his seat, head bopping to the music only he heard while he took a drink from his margarita. A slow smile slide across his face as the flavors of the tequila and Cougar played over his taste buds. Jensen gave a soft hum of pleasure before he realized the whole table was looking at him in shock.

“Dude, did you just,” Pooch found his voice first, but faltered on what verb to use. “Did you just lick, Cougar?” Pooch looked in shock at Jensen, Aisha had a both eyebrows raised, and Clay had his face buried in his hands. Cougar had not moved from where he had been when Jensen’s tongue assaulted his face.

Jensen raised his eyebrows in mock surprise, “What’s wrong with that? I needed salt for my margarita, and it worked perfectly didn’t it?” He took another happy sip of his margarita before he continued. “Besides what is the problem, it didn’t bother Cougar and none of the rest of you were options.” He gave a little shrug and glanced at Cougar. Jensen seemed a bit puzzled that there was no reaction from the sniper, not even an eyebrow raise. It started a little niggle of fear in Jensen’s gut, but he ignored it and turned his attention back to the table.

“What do you mean, ‘Cougar doesn’t mind’ he hasn’t moved?!”Pooch was glancing worriedly back and forth between Jensen and Cougar. Before he could ask anything else Aisha broke in.

“What did you mean none of the rest of us were ‘options?’” She slammed back her third shot without taking her eyes off of Jensen.

Jensen gave a small almost defeated sigh, and then took a long breath to launch into an explanation. “Well, Clay uses an aftershave and has a lot of stubble, so it would have been like licking really nasty sandpaper. Plus, Aisha would have killed me. Aisha, you were not an option because you use face products to control your acne, which it does a very good job I must say, plus your makeup. And most importantly you would have killed me.” Aisha shrugged and nodded to Jensen’s surprisingly accurate logic. “Pooch has the least amount of hair to worry about, but he’s a mechanic with a habit of rubbing his head and face when he is stressed. So that would have been the equivalent of licking a truck. And most of all when Jolene found out she,” here he was cut off by Aisha.

“She would have killed you, too?” Her eyebrow was again raised.

“Nope” Jensen shook his head and smirked at Pooch. “She would have encouraged me, and then shared WAY too many intimate details about Pooch. And that would have just been awkward at the next barbeque.” Pooch just groaned and rubbed his hand from the top of his head to his chin while he nodded. He could too easily picture Jolene encouraging Jensen and telling embarrassing facts to the team.

“So that just left Cougar.” He glanced at the still unmoving sniper and grimaced. “And I hoped that he wouldn’t kill me afterwards.”

Clay gave a loud bark of laughter and patted Jensen on the back. “That was some interesting logic you have, kid. I’m really glad I don’t know what goes on in your mind most of the time. But I think you might have broken our sniper…finally.” He was still chuckling as Jensen took another sip of his margarita, but gave a grimace as the margarita didn’t have the salt to help the flavor.

Jensen again sprang out of his seat and grasped Cougar’s face under the chin, and leaned forward to swipe another lick up the sniper’s face, only to find his tongue stuck. Glancing down Jensen realized his tongue had been caught by a finger and a thumb. Following the fingers to the arm he realized that Cougar had caught his tongue and was not giving it back. Cougar turned his head, disrupting Jensen’s hold on his chin, and faced the hacker. Their faces were only inches apart, and from that distance, Jensen could see hurt and turmoil in the sniper’s eyes. They blazed like he had not seen since Roque had turned on them.

“No.” The quiet word slipping out as he shook his head slightly. After another beat Cougar released Jensen’s tongue, and stood up and walked towards the door, not glancing back at the shocked teammates he left behind.

“Jensen, what did you do man?” Pooch asked the hacker who was still half standing, with his tongue hanging out, leaning over the chair Cougar had just vacated. Jensen shook his head as it slowly sunk in that Cougar had left and that he looked upset, something that was not a good sign.

“I didn’t…I don’t…ugh.” Jensen found that words failed him. He didn’t understand what had happened, it had just been teasing. Well for the most part. Before he could second guess himself, he turned and followed Cougar. Behind him Jensen heard his teammates talking amongst themselves.

“You owe me $50 Aisha.” Pooch mumbled.

“Not yet, he doesn’t know what he did, so it doesn’t count.” Aisha argued back. Jensen could just hear Clay’s voice rumble something he couldn’t make out as he left the bar.

The air outside the bar was refreshingly cool, and Jensen took a moment to enjoy it. With a sigh he scanned the surrounding area, his eyes settling on a dark alleyway. Hoping he was guessing correctly and not about to stumble across something he didn’t want to, Jensen ducked into the alley. It took his eyes a moment to adjust to the darker lighting, and then he saw the familiar silhouette of Cougar leaning against the alley wall, with his head and hat tucked down, and his chest moving as if he were taking deep breaths. Without even thinking about it Jensen moved until he was standing in front of Cougar, only to find that he had no idea what to say.

“Fuck off.” Came the dark voice from under the hat’s brim. Jensen usually loved the Hat, and capitalized its name in his head, but sometimes he hated it as well. If only he could see Cougar’s face he would have a better idea of what the other man was feeling, and if his plan was working or backfiring.

“No. Look, Cougs, I didn’t mean anything by before. It was no big deal, and I’m really sorry if I upset you. But I don’t really get…” Before he could finish his sentence he was pushed against to the alley wall behind him, with Cougar’s hand pinning his own above his head. He was face to face with Cougar, without the Hat in the way, and now he regretted wanting to see the other man’s face. Cougar’s eyes burned, and his mouth was turned down, and it was one of the coldest looks Jensen had ever received from the sniper (even colder than when he had accidentally spilled coffee on the Hat that one morning when he was severely concussed).

“Why?” The voice is quiet; more of a low growl, but underneath is a rawness that startles Jensen. Cougar still has not moved his eyes from where they are locked with Jensen’s but now there is a vulnerability that Jensen had not seen since right after the Bolivia catastrophe.

“I…” It took Jensen a moment to get his voice working again. “I don’t understand.” He shook his head to break the eye contact and buy himself a few more seconds. Luckily, Cougar spoke before Jensen could start rambling to disguise his confusion.

“Por qué fui la última opción?” ( _Why was I the last choice?_ ) Again it was more of a growl than words, and there was something in the tone that made Jensen’s chest tighten.

“No, no it wasn’t like that. Actually you were my first choice, I just had to justify why later. I mean I knew someone was going to ask and luckily none of them were really options anyway, not that I would have wanted to lick them anyway, eww that would have been gross. Not that I wanted to lick you, well actually maybe a little. Maybe just a bit curious at how you taste.” Jensen knew he was nervous jabbering, but he couldn’t stop the words, especially as Cougar was still pinning him to the wall and holding eye contact. They started to speed out of his mouth, as if they were trying to be said before he could regain control of his mouth. “Oh God, I didn’t mean that in a creepy cannibal sort of way, but more an academic sense. Well not really, more in a sexy times kind of way, butnotthatsortofsexytimesthatyouarethinkingof.GoddamnitI…”

It was only the sheer embarrassment at what had slipped out that allowed him to stop the words. He felt his cheeks tint pink and even his ears tried to get in on the embarrassment. To make it worse Cougar was still there, just inches from him with his laser eyes making Jensen spill all of his secrets. Just as he was contemplating trying to form a new apology, he saw a new emotion flicker across Cougar’s face.

Before Jensen could process what he had seen he was being hit in the head with the brim of the Hat, and then there was a pair of lips at his. For a moment it felt like his brain was a computer that someone had passed a magnet too close to, just a fuzzy blankness, and then he mentally high-fived himself and applied himself to kissing Cougar back. Who knew how long he would be allowed to, or how long he would survive after, he better make the most of it! It wasn’t until Cougar nipped at his lip hard enough to draw blood that Jensen pulled away.

“Be gentle, Cougar.” He admonished as he licked at his lip. Cougar’s eyes followed that movement very carefully. A smirk clung to his kiss bruised lips.

“You started it.” He stated as he ducked forward to lick soothingly at Jensen’s abused lip. Jensen was happy to continue kissing until voices outside the alley distracted them both.

“Cougs, unless you want to have Clay, Pooch, and Aisha interrupt us, I suggest we return to either the bar or our room.” The sniper raised an eyebrow at this. “I believe if you would like to keep drinking, I have a hidden bottle of tequila.” Jensen tried wiggling his eyebrows in a seductive way, but this just caused Cougar to grin, and shake his head more in fondness rather than blind lust, which had been Jensen’s intention.

“Pero, no tenemos sal.” ( _But, we don’t have salt_ ) Cougar stated plainly, as he pulled away from Jensen and the wall, but kept one of their hands tangled together. Pulling Jensen to the entrance to the alleyway, Cougar’s intentions were clear for Jensen.

“I might have lied earlier about having to have salt and not liking tequila. However, I think you do have salt. And I have some ‘academic’ curiosity to appease.” Jensen said as he ducked under Cougar’s Hat and licked a swipe of skin at the junction of Cougar’s neck and shoulder, before lightly biting it. Cougar growled, and started pulling them quickly to their room.

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote this 3-4 years ago, and it was only missing a couple paragraphs. I hate leaving anything unfinished, so here it is. It is also my first Losers fic, so hopefully it is ok!  
> The Spanish is based on my limited knowledge of the language, so if it isn't correct please let me know.  
> Also this story had no beta, so if there is an English spelling/grammar error please let me know as well.


End file.
